Lately, I’ve been spouting off a lot about TRUST. How I’m trusting that I am where I need to be and that where I’m headed is the right direction. I’m trusting that things will work out and I’m trusting that all these opportunities I’m saying yes to will somehow come together to form this great big lovely life I want. When people ask what I’m doing, I say, “trusting,” and they don’t know what to say to that because it makes me sound like some guru-level wise woman who sweats patience and benevolently chuckles at their ant-like scurrying.
But I am sooooo not.
It’s damn hard to trust. And what am I trusting, anyway? “The Universe” isn’t like some shady boyfriend; you can’t check it’s phone for guilty texts and it can’t prove itself by maintaining eye contact when a miniskirt struts by. I can sit down and have a talk with it about how I want to be treated, but it’s a one-sided conversation. How do I know that I even should be trusting?
Well, I don’t. And it freaks me out sometimes. When I slam into a figurative detour sign on the road I’m speeding down (which has happened a LOT lately) I flip. I get nervous and anxious and start to question myself and where I was headed. But then, I choose to trust. I could figure out a way around the detour sign or ram it down with my car, but I choose to believe that it’s there for a reason, and follow it.
I don’t know where I’d be if I HAD run over the detour and kept on my merry way, but I’m pretty happy with where I am now; I can’t think of much – if anything – in my past I would change, and therefore, my faith has never led me wrong.
I believe in a higher power. You can call it God (I do) or Yaweh or Jesus or Buddha or Elohim or Allah or The Universe or Frank. I don’t think it cares what you call it, I believe it cares that we live with love and positive intention. I don’t mean to offend anyone who thinks differently; there are many religious views I disagree with and I expect to be disagreed with on mine by someone. It’s ok, we can still be friends.
The God I believe in created us all, loves us all and wants us all to love each other. The Universe I believe in is the way that all things are connected under God, and it responds to my energy because it is part of me. When I do good and feel good, I get good in return. When I am negative and angry, I get that right back too. I see this manifest in my life and so I believe it. I feel the presence of God in every moment of gratitude and in every good thing. When I feel secure, when I feel loved, when I feel happy and my gut instinct is singing a tuning forks perfect pitch, I feel that God is with me, so I believe.
Simple as that.
I could be wrong. I’m only human. My idea of God is only what I’ve experienced & a lot of people experience it differently. But I figure, even if I am wrong, it’s led me to live a life of joy, kindness and calm. I try to do good and feel happy, and help others to live the same way, and there’s no amount of religious dogma or rational argument that can convince me that’s not the right way to live.
So, when I trust, I am trusting in God’s wisdom and love, The Universe’s safety-net web of intention & connection, and my own gut instinct, guided by both. When I trust, I release my idea of the outcome in order to let better things in. When I trust, I can enjoy each moment. When I trust, I am taken care of.
And I don’t need some dude’s text messages to tell me that.